Asking Eric: Should I keep reaching out in a one-side friendship?

Key Takeaways:

• A year passed without contact between friends.
• The questioner took a deliberate step back to assess the friend’s interest.
• The friend eventually reached out, prompting renewed uncertainty.
• This piece focuses on how to handle a one-sided dynamic.
• R. Eric Thomas addresses the complexities of maintaining or ending such relationships.

Reevaluating a Friendship

The reader behind this question had grown concerned about being the only one who made attempts to keep in touch. When they finally decided to stop initiating visits, an entire year passed without any message or call.

When the Calls Stop

After feeling drained by the lack of reciprocity, the questioner stepped back, testing whether the friend would notice their absence. This decision highlighted the burden of one-sided connections—when you are always the one making the effort, you eventually start to question the value of that relationship.

A Surprising Reconnection

More than a year later, the friend sent a text message inquiring why they had not been in contact. This sudden outreach reopened the conversation about whether it was worth re-investing energy in a seemingly one-sided relationship.

The Advice Angle

In his column, R. Eric Thomas examines how and why friendships slip into one-sided territory, and whether it’s beneficial to reclaim or release the time and emotional energy spent on individuals who only reciprocate sporadically. While no single answer works for every situation, acknowledging the reasons behind such an imbalance often helps individuals move forward—either by finding ways to rekindle genuine connection or by choosing to let go.