Asking Eric: Is it worth the trauma to stay in the neighborhood where my attacker lives?

Baltimore Sun advice columnist Eric Thomas confronts two piercing reader questions: whether it is worth the emotional cost to remain in a neighborhood shared with an attacker, and how to respond when a close friend disappears without explanation. His “Asking Eric” column lays bare the tangled calculus of safety, trauma and loyalty.

Key Takeaways:

  • The column centers on a survivor debating whether to keep living near their attacker.
  • It weighs the psychological impact of place and the logistics of relocation.
  • A second letter asks how to cope with a friend who has abruptly “ghosted.”
  • Both dilemmas are answered by writer and adviser Eric Thomas.
  • The piece was published in The Baltimore Sun on Aug. 19, 2025.

Introduction
In the Aug. 19 edition of “Asking Eric,” Baltimore Sun writer Eric Thomas receives two profoundly personal letters, each orbiting around absence—one physical, one emotional. Together they frame a modern struggle: how do we reclaim ordinary life when it is shadowed by fear or abandonment?

The Geography of Trauma
“Is it worth the trauma to stay in the neighborhood where my attacker lives?” a reader asks, laying bare the tension between familiarity and fear. The question itself captures an aching dilemma: safety may demand distance, yet leaving home carries its own costs—lost routines, uprooted support systems, and the weight of starting over.

When a Friend Disappears
The column’s second letter shifts from bodily threat to social silence: “Our friend ghosted us for no apparent reason. Should we just let her go?” In that short line, a friendship’s sudden vacuum is exposed. No confrontation, no explanation—just a digital vanishing act that leaves the abandoned searching for closure.

Why Advice Columns Endure
Though the specifics differ, both letters reach for the same compass—community wisdom. Advice columns like “Asking Eric” offer a public square where private hurts can be named, considered, and, if not solved, at least shared. In a world of constant connection, the quiet counsel of a columnist remains a lifeline.

Closing Thoughts
Eric Thomas’ latest column reminds readers that the hardest decisions often hinge not on facts, but on how those facts feel. To stay or to flee, to hold on or let go—each choice is weighted with history and hope. For the letter writers, and for many who read along, the answers may begin with the simple assurance that their questions are worth asking.